It’s June now, which means, of course, that the boys are currently obsessing over their hand-me-down VHS copy of “Santa Claus is Comin’ To Town,” one of those Rankin/Bass beauties from the 60’s.
Josh is the main culprit – he loves that movie. He won’t be satisfied till he’s had enough rehearsal time to know every rickety dance step. So he’s usually watched it at least twice before I get downstairs in the morning, standing smack in front of the TV, singing along and trying to do whatever moves he can.
Ben pretends to be irritated, but he’s been talking a lot about what we’re going to do this Christmas. Or, more precisely, what SANTA is going to do this Christmas: come down our chimney, fill stockings full of toys, etc. Your Standard Santa Procedure.
Now, here’s my problem with all of this. Uh, other than the fact that someone made the mistake of convincing Mickey Rooney he’s a singer. And the lyrics to this song, of course. Innocent enough, but once you’ve heard it for the 50th time, new interpretations sneak into your head.
No, my problem lies more in the Do We or Don’t We area.We just haven’t made a big deal out of Santa these past 5 years, haven’t talked him up or really addressed presents from him or anything. We have done the post-bedtime stocking filling and present-wrapping. But, you know, kids are young and clueless. When a 4–year-old wakes up one morning and finds presents waiting for him, he’s not thinking “What thoughtful person left me carefully wrapped gifts in the wee sma’s?” He’s thinking “WOO-HOO!!!”
Since the day Ben was born I’ve tried to be as honest with him as a parent possibly can be. I never liked the idea of making up bogey monsters to keep kids in line or things like that. If he asks me something I think he just shouldn’t know, I let him know why instead of making up some fantastic nonsense explanation. I try, anyway. So the Santa thing really bugs me. To me, it feels like another lie. I can barely bring myself to nod when he’s waxing enthusiastic about it. But, you know, it’s THE lie. The one most accepted and perpetuated. And the one it feels most wrong NOT to tell. My choices would appear to be lie to my kid or ruin one of the most pervasive myths ever to give a kid hope and get him excited.
It hasn’t been a problem up to now. Ben just hasn’t been all that aware of the myth. But now we’ve got this stupid movie in constant rotation which purports to explain all the Whys of Santa. Some of them being ridiculous stretches (he got his distinctive HoHoHo from the seals he played with as a child), but it works. And so he’s now well aware of Santa and all the attending myths, and I’ve got six months to figure out how I’m going to handle it.
I’m guessing I’ll go the easy route and do some perpetuating of my own – it IS fun, after all – but I just know I’ll feel a little bit dirty while I’m doing it. Ah, well, parenting wouldn’t be rewarding if it weren’t hard.
Hey, any thoughts from the Peanut Gallery, as long as I’m posting this for y’all to see?
3 comments:
Oh how we have debated this at my house!!!
My husband HATES Santa! Or rather, he hates what Santa has become. Mostly it is that kids will get so excited about Santa and presents and completely miss the real reason for Christmas. And he also hates the idea of lying to kids.
I LOVE Santa! Or rather, I love what he should be and what I try to make him at our house. I love shopping for gifts, secretly stuffing stockings, and watching the next morning as my daughter's eyes light up and knowing she has no idea that it was me who did it.
We talked alot with our daughter (now 6 yrs. old) about the true meaning of Christmas, we have tons of traditions including reading spiritual thoughts, scriptures, singing hymns, giving service - daily in December. We encourage her to be selfless and focus on others. She helps to choose gifts to give a little girl her age from a Giving Tree. I use money that would normally be spent on her and let her know that, so she knows it is really coming from her, not Mom and Dad. We also make sure she cleans out some of her toys in December to donate to kids who don't have toys.
We have taught her about the
"spirit of Santa". How when someone wants to give a gift to someone else without them knowing, then they become a Santa. We talk about how Santa can remind us of Jesus. (Kind, selfless, giving, loves children, etc) And when asked the dreaded quesion, "Is Santa real?" we answer that he is "magic pretend". And that's the truth. The "spirit of Santa" is a kind of magic that comes over us, making us want to give secretly. And Santa himself is certainly pretend. This definition kept me baffled when I was younger but made me excited when I found out "who" Santa was - because then I could be Santa too.
I think this works well in my family. We don't "push" Santa ourselves, we don't use the "You had better be good because Santa's watching" line, we don't tell her she needs to write a letter to him. But if she writes one on her own, we "mail" it without making a fuss.
Santa still comes to our house, but he is not the reason for Christmas. And instead of taking away from the real reason, he helps create an opportunity for us to celebrate and add to the spirit of what Christmas should be.
This is what we do and maybe you will find some of these things help your family too. But most important is to decide what you feel comfortable teaching your children. Pray about it, talk with your husband, get ideas from families you admire, then choose what is best for you.
Sorry for the long comment!
Long comments definitely welcome! Thanks for the perspective. That looks like a very nice way to handle it.
Well, you know, there's always the Great Pumpkin at Halloween. I don't know what that has to do with Christmas and the whole Santa thing, but it's a happy memory from my childhood, watching a Peanuts special. It could be that it comes before Christmas and thus, the start of the whole junk food craze for the holiday season (mind you, the best homemade junkfood; the good kind - Grandma's Ice Box cookies, anyone?). The Happy Uncle. :)
Post a Comment